I talked to my doctor this morning and after explaining to her about my rash(it’s everywhere now) she decided that we’re just going to go a head with the colonoscopy. My fever is also back. I’m no longer taking the Imuran or the antibiotics. I haven’t gotten my stool results yet so who knows what’s going on there. It takes about 5 days for them to be posted to the patient portal at the hospital so I should know what’s going on later this week. Kind of ironic that I’m having anther colonoscopy(number 3!) seeing how it’s World IBD Day. It’s also going to be a shitty way to spend Memorial Day(my colonoscopy is next Tuesday). I was looking forward to some BBQ 🙁
This also means that I will probably be going on the biologics which will mean a fight with the insurance company I’m sure. I was looking at their forms for enrolling in their ‘specialty’ pharmacy and there isn’t even one for Ulcerative Colitis. I know my doctors don’t know what I have(they’ve been going with UC so far but aren’t 100% sure that’s it) but I think it’s some bullshit that it’s not even listed. There’s people with UC that have to go on biologics so why wouldn’t it be listed?
I just hope that this colonoscopy gives some insight as to what the hell is going on. I’ve never had one during a flare so we’ll see. I did refuse to get SuPrep because it is nasty so I will be prepping with MirLax. So it shouldn’t be too bad. At least it won’t make me want to puke. I’m sure I’ll be living off of chicken broth and Gatorade for the day. Although maybe I’ll drink some jello water. I used to do that all the time as a kid, lol.
Today is also my first World IBD Day. One thing my disease has done for me is make me take advantage of the days I’m actually feeling well. Which I was able to do this past Saturday before I started feeling terrible again. You don’t realize how much you take your health for granted until it’s not there for you anymore. I hate how sick I am. I hate how I don’t know what food is going to mess me up. I hate that I keep having bad reactions to the medications that are supposed to help me. My allergy list for medications keeps getting longer and longer. I really hope that we can find a biologic that will work for me if my doctors decide to go that route.
I just want to feel better already. I’ve been in a flare for about 6 weeks now. And I’m tired of it. I’m also going to have to post-pone getting my tattoo finished unfortunately. With the fever and the rash I have right now I don’t want to put my body under any unnecessary stress if I can help it. I’m a bit bummed out about it. I was really looking forward to seeing what the finished product will look like. Maybe I’ll be feeling better in a couple of weeks and I’ll be able to get it finished. I can hope right?
“You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have.”